Bitten

Well you were still in my reader. I'm doing Nano t...

2009-10-25T00:07:32.268-05:00

Well you were still in my reader. I'm doing Nano too. Good luck with it.

I like this ending. I wouldn't have been satisfied...

2009-07-05T18:18:07.656-05:00

I like this ending. I wouldn't have been satisfied with the previous episode finishing the way it did. Though it works as a conclusion too many loose ends made me wonder if you lost your grip on Selene's character. You brought back a depth to her that the action sequences removed.

Really enjoyed it and will follow you next story.

They really should have consummated in that clearing though. I sense you wanted that to happen but held back. They are primary beasts underneath that human guise. Sex sells Arielle.

I loved this story and would read it religiously h...

2009-06-22T08:42:38.398-05:00

I loved this story and would read it religiously hoping for updates constantly! While i'm sad that it is over i'm happy for Selene, also if you start up becoming again i'm so totally going to be there (thats how i found this site fyi)! Keep up the great work and great stories!

ARIELLE. You have no idea how much I love you for ...

2009-06-18T19:14:20.306-05:00

ARIELLE. You have no idea how much I love you for this amazing ending. I loved it, I cant wait for you to edit it, and publish it, I'd so order it. And.. Twilight was kinda cheesy, you did an awesome ending, it's great. With some editing, and adding a few more stuff, descriptions, maybe a few more characters.. I think you have an excellent book, I love it. It's amazing. You're a genius. I hate you.

<3 Rio.

Running wild will take your mind off things, but f...

2009-06-18T10:29:26.074-05:00

Running wild will take your mind off things, but for a person that isn't much of a life.

I liked Bitten and think it was a good story. I will see if my other half will read it, she likes vamps so she might like this.

Well all left over power had to do something. Nic...

2009-06-18T10:23:08.810-05:00

Well all left over power had to do something. Nice to see that Selene get back up.

I can see why she doesn't want to stay. She would just be a reminder of the bad time they had, and they would just remind her of how rough her start was and about Lilith.

It was pretty quick, and it'll probably end up a b...

2009-06-17T11:26:14.344-05:00

It was pretty quick, and it'll probably end up a bit longer, but since there were two fights back-to-back, I didn't want you guys to become bogged down. I imagine these two scenes will be pretty different when I get around to the rewrite. There's quite a bit I want to change. The plot won't change, but minor detail changes will help to enhance the story.

That was a nasty quick fight. Then again with the...

2009-06-17T10:57:21.683-05:00

That was a nasty quick fight. Then again with the power of the whole pack behind her Selene was able to tear right thru Lilith.

Now I wonder how the rest of the pack with react when they find out that Lucille was a vampire. And they were saved by the one they didn't want to begin with.

o.o That was.. amazing, I liked it, I didnt find i...

2009-06-16T17:01:18.910-05:00

o.o That was.. amazing, I liked it, I didnt find it awkward, at all. I thought it was nice and smooth, and I could feel the action. I liked it

R.I.P Quinn ._.

Sadly Selene has already fought Lilith and lost on...

2009-06-16T10:40:42.717-05:00

Sadly Selene has already fought Lilith and lost once. I wonder how she plans on beating her this time, maybe borrow power from those people that are present to help win.

If she does though, I do not think it will go over well with the pack.

It is a jump from the previous chapter but it stil...

2009-06-08T05:49:56.468-05:00

It is a jump from the previous chapter but it still flows well. Your rewrite will pick this up and smooth it out I'm sure. Make the last chapters memorable, different, unexpected, and you will achieve your goal.

It was a bit sudden, but we also knew that Lilith ...

2009-06-03T10:37:15.464-05:00

It was a bit sudden, but we also knew that Lilith planned to take Quinn on at sometime.

That looks like it is going to be a nasty fight.

Oh that's nasty, I can't stand it when other peopl...

2009-06-02T12:03:58.951-05:00

Oh that's nasty, I can't stand it when other people don't clean up their mess. It is kinda shocking that the little hamster lived that long.

Well now things could get interesting. I am sure we will see lots of drama with Lilith in a short amount of time.

OMFG loved it, It was awesome, and awww, River is ...

2009-06-01T23:06:34.024-05:00

OMFG loved it, It was awesome, and awww, River is so likeable, I wish you gave her more.. story line, more drama, more!! When you rewrite, I think she deserves some love and more drama. I expected to read a bit about Lilith, what is she doing for break, where is she going, etc.

Nonetheless, it was great. Loved it.

A little bird told me you're back =) Hope you had ...

2009-06-01T05:18:32.126-05:00

A little bird told me you're back =) Hope you had fun!

Now get writing! >=(

I wouldn't say that Selene's mom was over the top,...

2009-05-26T18:09:53.637-05:00

I wouldn't say that Selene's mom was over the top, just a woman with an obsession that she couldn't let go.

That did go about as well as Selene thought it would. Oh well at least it is over with.

First off, congratulations Mrs. Fragassi =) I hope...

2009-05-20T15:17:44.084-05:00

First off, congratulations Mrs. Fragassi =) I hope you're having an amazing time!

Secondly, I like the idea of setting scenarios. It's not like every moment of the story has to see some new problem arise or get solved. You could probably just deepen the characters a little bit, or introduce a useless character (although I'm not too sure if that's a good idea, it might detract from the plot too long)

Nevertheless, here I am, all caught up! =) And it's been great so far... Keep it up!

I got quite sucked in with this one. Very fluid an...

2009-05-14T06:14:00.000-05:00

I got quite sucked in with this one. Very fluid and well paced.

Grats on getting married, and happy early birthday...

2009-05-13T12:32:00.000-05:00

Grats on getting married, and happy early birthday.

Chapter looks good, things could get nasty before to long.

I liked it! And w00t, this sat, im happy for you A...

2009-05-13T10:44:00.000-05:00

I liked it! And w00t, this sat, im happy for you Arielle :]

Looking at her mom and how she views the change. ...

2009-05-05T10:48:00.000-05:00

Looking at her mom and how she views the change. I would say it going badly for thanksgiving could be an understatement.

Her mom is one of those that never gives up no matter what. Sometimes that's a good thing, other times they go off the deep end.
Good luck on your tests.

Daymon: Thanks for finding the mistake, sometimes ...

2009-05-01T08:22:00.000-05:00

Daymon: Thanks for finding the mistake, sometimes N's look like H's to me, silly fonts. :P You're right about the friendship thing. Lilith isn't really being all that mean to her, she's just using her. She even offered her a position in the Pack.

Rio: Did you read the last part of my note? They're not bffs, it's kind of like that sort of friendship when you tolerate and talk to someone because they're the only one you can.

I wouldn't say they are best friends, more like th...

2009-04-30T15:01:00.000-05:00

I wouldn't say they are best friends, more like they are days they get along better than most. It is hard to keep that kind of anger going all the time, more so if the other person is being almost friendly.

Could also be the blood loss as that will make you do silly things as well. And being fead on does do things to people in other vampire stories.

I think you mean "how long" here: "staying with us or now long."

Selene and Lilith's relationship confuses me ._. o...

2009-04-30T13:56:00.000-05:00

Selene and Lilith's relationship confuses me ._. one day they hate each other, the next they're bffs laughing about they're dramatic roommates?

I think this chapter was done pretty well. I can ...

2009-04-24T11:36:00.000-05:00

I think this chapter was done pretty well. I can see that poor Selene is waiting for the other shoe to drop. We know it's going to happen just not when.

Selene or Randall really need to get more allies in the pack for when the crap hits the fan. But getting Randall to believe they need allies is the trick.